Punctum Inc. Seedpod
Bendigo, 18 - 23 June, 2012
We are very proud to present ROARAWAR FEARTATA’s Small Catastrophe’s preliminary findings. As the future unfolds, so do our challenges including the small catastrophes along the way. Successfully embracing our changing environments is the pathway to a positive outlook. Drawing from the Bendogolian community’s own view and small catastrophisms, this data is beyond the exclusive official council reports documenting this great city’s demographicalities.
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12.498% participating respondents registered small cultural catastrophe’s with 60% subjected to the lows of Bendigo’s culture. 20% nominated Bendigo’s culture also as too local or exotic.
Interestingly, 40% hazard Bendigo’s culture as too different whilst 60% are too familiar with it.
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This predicament inexplicably manifests itself on Wednesdays for 20% of Bendigolians whilst 40% experience it as either a weekly phenomenon or just a Monday-thing.
16.63% are mildly culturally catastrophised at 9am or 1pm whilst 33.25% do either at exactly 5pm or after.
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20% are mildly culturally moribund for 5-20 minutes while 80% of Bendigo’s population are perpetually slightly perplexed.
17.36% fist clench, 13.02% pffff, 8.68% exaggeratedly exhale, foot stomp, directionlessly mope or proffer empty, non-violent threats. 4.34% across the board alternatively head scratch, drop their arms exasperatedly, mutter rebukes, hand wring, indirectly complain, roll eyes, smile ruefully or resign themselves to slight cultural enfeeblements.
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16.63% believe these reactions are not appropriate whilst a whopping 83.37% do.
80% ruminate upon this tiny cultural disability, whilst 20% do so regularly.
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40% believe there is no chance they dreamt their mild cultural inadequacies, whilst 20% evenly believe this is but a daydream, possible but unlikely or not unlikely.
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I dreamt I remember it was a bad dream. Me and my friends were all playing left for dead, then I was Australia’s best coffee roaster. Then I went to Japan and bought a live Pokeman. I might as well have taken acid. I was a Pokeman trainer and I got attacked by everything. I don’t even remember playing Pokemon. I fell off a tower but I never landed, no I don’t have any dreams.
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8.332% of the total 24 respondents were partially catastrophised with food and in particular this was divided 50% between those of the processed variety and that of beverages.
Again, sliced straight down the middle, 50% believed they had either too little or too much, as you would expect.
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And once again 50% of these incidences occurred Wednesdays or Fridays before 9am and after 5pm.
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Furthermore, the duration of these incidental culinary misadventures was 50% each way between 5-20 minutes and on-going.
50% muttered rebukes while the other half rolled their eyes.
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50% never think about the incident whilst the other 50% occasionally do.
50% believed there was no chance daydreaming occurred whilst 50% also possibly daydreamt. It was, however, unlikely.
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I dreamt of an old Victorian house.
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12.498% of total participating respondents are experiencing or have had a small catastrophe with God.
These are evenly spread at 33.1/3% across the board between finding or discovering there is a god, doubting such a presence exists or having misplaced it.
66 and 2/3% believe this mildly catastrophic encounter is because it is just too simple whilst 331/3% believe the concept too exclusive.
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25% are conflicted with this metaphysical dilemma on either Thursday or Saturday, whilst 50% are predictably troubled Sundays.
66.2/3% are cosmologically fraught at 10am and 33.1/3% after 5pm.
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66.2/3% have the duration of this minute theological crisis occur for 1-2 hours whilst for 33.1/3% it is ongoing or one might say eternal.
Interestingly of the 100% of people in a mild existential turmoil chose other as their reaction in response to their mystical quandary by either teeth grinding, stressing, swearing or losing faith in said God.
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Curiously also, 66.2/3% believe this appropriate whilst 33.1/3% believe otherwise and that in hindsight they might have calmed down and focused rather than stress and swear.
33.1/3% think about the minutiae of their catastrophic deism not very often, whilst 66.2/3% believe they do occasionally.
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66.2/3% believe there is no chance they were daydreaming when this incidental transcendentalism occurred whilst 33.1/3% are convinced such mildly catastrophic mysterium tremendum et fascinans was nothing but a daydream!
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Difficulty remembering dreams. There was an intruder in the house stealing paintings mounted to the wall. And I told them to go away. They didn’t so I tried to trip them and thenmy wife woke up because I kicked her. And then I woke up going to a party with 400 people. OUR DREAMS ARE TALES TOLD IN DIM EDEN.
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12.483% of total 24 participating respondents registered small catastrophic relationships evenly spread out at 33.1/3% across the classifications of incidental, collegiate and unauthorized.
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Again each were divided 33.1/3% for being either too needy, short or safe. 66.2/3% of these miniscule catastrophic relationships occur Saturdays, which makes sense and the other 33.1/3% Wednesdays.
In fact 100% of the small catastrophic realtionships of the collegiate variety occurred on Wednesdays.
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Again, spread equitably 33.1/3% the duration of these ever so-slight catastrophic relationships ranged from less than one minute, 5-20 minutes and 1-2 hours. 66.2/3% of these minutely troubling relationships wrought rueful smiles whilst the other 33.1/3% only mildly vented their spleens or proffered empty non-violent threats.
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100% were adamant these were appropriate.
66.2/3% occasionally ruminated upon their brief bout of relational misfortune whilst the other 33.1/3% do so “not very often”.
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66.2/3% of these purport no chance of daydreaming, whilst 33.1/3% realised their microscopic relational regret was a daydream.
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Unexpectedly intimate with a close friend I dreamt about 360 degrees and slept with the sunny cow girls.
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20.83% of participating respondents take issue with the small catastrophism of travel, with 80% experiencing a small catastrophic encounter upon public transport and the other 20% as jet-setting aeronautic travelers.
42.25% believe this is because it is too crowded, 28.25% because too late and anomalously because 14.25% because it is too fast and slow, too early and late, too crowded and tiring. Another 14.25% believe aeronautical travel is too hot.
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25% experience these mildly catastrophic forms of mobility on Mondays or Tuesdays; 37.5% Fridays and 12.5% on a weekly basis. Interestingly, or rather, curiously, 100% of aeronautical jet-setters small catastrophic experiences are isolated to Fridays. These incidences occur evenly at 20% whenever the clock strikes 10am, 2-3 & 4pm as well as daily.
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The duration of the incidences registered by respondents were 40% between 5-20 minutes whilst 20% reported less than a minute, 1-2 hours and on-going.
20% preferred muttered rebukes, whilst 40% favoured indirect complpaining whilst another 40% chose “other” including “freaking out” and “swearing”.
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100% believe all their responses were appropriate.
20% of respondents they think of the incident either never, very often or all the time whilst 40% believe not very often.
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100% of small catastrophants believe there is no chance they were daydreaming when such incidences occurred.
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Colourfully, there I was, putting crumpets in the toaster, rainbow and lollipops eaten by a Tyrannosaurus Rex made of ants. This one time was at … no, that didn’t happen.
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24.996% of participating respondents have small meteorological catastrophes with 16.63% across the board having issues indoor, seasonally and with forecasts while 50% had incidences occur unexpectedly outdoor. Also, data reflects predictably 60% think it too cold during winter while 20% are divided between it being too wet and dry!
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37.5% have their meteorological catastrophes Monday, 25% Thursday and Fridays and 12.5% weekly.
27.16% experience this meteorological small catastrophism before 9am or after 5pm. Another 18.16% at 4pm and 9.16% at 12-3 & 4pm or daily.
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22.143% prefer to express their qualms with the vicissitudes of mother nature’s temperament via exaggerated exhalations or indirect complaining whilst across the board 11.143% alternatively fist clench, foot stomp, mutter rebukes, directionlessly mope or choose to become paralytic or immobile.
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75% of people taking issue with the climate believe definitively that they were not daydreaming. 25% think daydreaming might have been a possibility.
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100% of Bendogolian’s believe these are appropriate and evenly across the board 25% believe they think about their meteorological grievances either not very often, occasionally, regularly or very often.
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Never remember my dreams. I have no dreams just walking, long, long road, no exits, no pathways, distant horizons, sunshine, no clouds, just walking. Walking. I was on a boat. I don’t remember my dreams.
